Instead, I'll talk Gratitude

My head has been swimming with all kinds things to rant about - unclear childcare situation for Sidney, the stupid cat, etc. - but instead of focusing on what's stressing me out, I'll talk about what I'm thankful for...'tis the season and all.

MIKE - Oh my God, I don't know how I'd do ANY of this without him. He is truly the best partner I could imagine. We share the workload, often times he does more than his share, and it makes it all manageable. We love our little team, even when things are rough. I could go on and on, but just trust me when I say he's the best.

MY MOM - I don't know what I'd do without her help. (Are you sensing a theme here? Childrearing was never meant to be done alone!) We've been lucky that my parents live close enough to us that they can come visit/babysit with relatively short notice. And now with 2 kids, we realized how much we need them! I have found that even when I'm home alone during the week and I'm hands-free for a couple hours while Sid naps, I'm never that motivated to get things done. I still need an extra pair of hands to help with certain tasks, or at least get me moving toward accomplishing something. My mom has been great at that, as well as helping with random errands and things that are much more difficult for me to do with one or both kids in tow, like running to store to buy milk or doing the dishes or laundry. It's so amazing to not have to worry about some of the little things while she's here, so I can take care of other bigger tasks, or just rest when I need it. Thanks Mom!

ALL OF THE FAMILY - Not single out just one person, but everyone has been amazing this year and always. My dad, for doing ANYTHING we need and helping us with some of the more mundane tasks of being adults (thank goodness he loves taking care of cars!). My in-laws who make an incredible effort to come visit us as often as they can, so they can be in Ivy and Sidney's lives.

IVY AND SIDNEY - Kids are a ton of work, but it's so worth it. Even when Ivy tests my patience, she quickly follows up with a quip that leaves me laughing for days. And Sidney is just starting to smile and is as cuddly as ever, making those 3am feedings tolerable. Best of all is how they are together - Ivy is madly in love, and Sid is sweet enough to put up with her near-suffocating hugs.

OUR COMMUNITY - When else would we get to indulge in friendship and love on a weekly basis? Shabbat has truly become our oasis in the desert of our week. Every week is a celebration - of a new baby, a coming of age, a marriage, or just simply being together and learning and connecting. We're so blessed to be amongst such wonderful, supportive people who also happen to give generously of their hand-me-downs!

We're headed to San Diego tomorrow for a big family Thanksgiving with Mike's parents, Erica and Adam, and all of the Rogoffs. Should be a feast to remember! Oh, and yesterday Sid turned 2 months...holy crap, the time has flown!

Somehow I Manage

(10 points to whoever gets the title of this post. It's the favorite joke around our house these days.)

It's been a while since I last blogged. To be honest, the days sorta blur together when you're exhausted and not doing anything worthy of note during most days, except driving to and from preschool and writing thank you notes. But I'm starting to realize how loudly the clock of my remaining maternity leave is ticking, and really trying to enjoy each and every day. Thank god, the weather has been gorgeous...a small consolation to the end of daylight savings time. I've been taking some really nice walks in the neighborhood, sometimes alone but often with my friends and their babies. And I've barely noticed that it's now dark soon after 5:00 because those few hours before Ivy goes to bed are incredibly hectic trying to get dinner on the table and baths done, etc.

Speaking of hectic, hats off to all those stay-at-home moms out there who juggle 2 kids all day! Last Thursday was my first FULL day home alone with BOTH kids. It was amazing, and incredibly hard at the same time. We had a lazy morning in pjs after Mike left for work, finishing breakfast and playing in the living room, only getting dressed when Ivy's poopy diaper was too much for my nose to bear. I managed to get all three of us dressed, and then, feeling ambitious, I decided to try to make a phone call about an outstanding hospital/insurance bill issue before we headed out for our playdate. That was poor move on my part, since it took longer than I thought and turned out to be more complicated to solve that I thought, prompting me to burst into tears while simultaneously trying to get a toddler to put on socks and shoes. Ivy, despite her stubborn independence of a 2-year old, is quite empathetic actually and her face immediately became concerned as she asked "Are you okay Mommy?" Her little smile makes everything okay...maybe she can charm Cedars into figuring out the billing issue!

We packed up our lunch and headed to the park for a fun afternoon with some of Ivy's best buds - Abby, Simon, and a few others from her preschool class - and some of my best buds too. But it was really windy, with sand blowing in little people's eyes so we headed home after less than 2 hours. Ivy decided she wanted to walk, and made it a little over half way. This actually turned out to be brilliant, because when we got home she was SO tired that she actually napped! We all did, in fact, and it was awesome. Except for the part where I had to do the unthinkable and wake her up to go to my doctor's appointment. (Insert sad face here.)

Now here's where it gets fun. We pull into the doctor's office 15 minutes late, but I figure if I have a 3:15 appointment, there's no way in heck he's running on time, so I don't feel bad (especially since he didn't see me until after 4:00). And I'm trying to look all cool and collected, like wrangling a litter was a piece of cake...I'd feel bad if any mothers-to-be in the waiting room got the wrong impression of what it's like to have children. Within minutes, Ivy had left a trail of corn flake crumbs all around the reception area and had discovered the water cooler, from which she filled a little cup and then promptly spilled it everywhere. There was another 2 year old there with her parents, and Ivy graciously shared her toy but informed her "Don't touch my baby!" when she peered into the carseat.

Fortunately the appointment was a quick check-up, though Ivy hates seeing me have my blood pressure taken, and I can't imagine what was going through her head during the pelvic exam... And she unknowingly carried out one of Mike's favorite OB office jokes. He's always wanted to comply when the nurse instructs the patient to undress from the waist down, just to see how the doctor would react, and as we were getting ready to leave Ivy took of her pants. It took several minutes of coaxing to get her to put them back on.

We topped off our big day at Ralph's, to get a few staples since frankly that's all there was room for when Ivy takes up the baby seat and Sidney's car seat took up the entire rest of the cart (I had forgotten the Moby). A few cartons of yogurt and we had to be done. Came home, threw together a quick dinner, and then swiftly handed them off to Mike so I could prepare to go out to the J Street LA kick off event. Damn straight I enjoyed a glass of champagne! But I realized as I was driving home how much I missed the little ones, even though I was exhausted. It's the ultimate Mommy Catch-22 - I can't imagine how I'd survive as a full time stay-at-home mom, but then when I'm at work I want to be with them so badly...and I feel guilty for not thinking I could manage at home every day.

If you're wondering if I'm going to eventually make a point with this ramble other than being a boring, detailed account of an ordinary day, then you'll be disappointed. I just felt bad that I hadn't blogged in a while, and the day gave me pause and perspective - I'm really trying to focus on how to make this time count, both with Sidney and Ivy, even when it's a major drain on the system. ::wipes tear:: More to share soon.

How scrumptious is this little guy?

Thanks to Christine Haws Photography for taking such beautiful pictures!